


Natasha, Pierre & the Great High School of 2017

by theghostquartet



Category: Natasha Pierre and the Great Comet of 1812 - Malloy, Voyná i mir | War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, TW for emotional abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-07-01
Packaged: 2018-11-20 14:56:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11337789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theghostquartet/pseuds/theghostquartet
Summary: Natasha Rostova enters high school as a bright-eyed and lovestruck freshman, prepared for what should be the best four years of her life. Then, Anatole Kuragin comes into the picture.





	1. i.

"You're going to be fine."

Natasha stood, frozen, in front of the mirror of her bathroom. She looked herself over again from head to toe and took one of her shaking hands off the notebooks in her arms to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

"You're going to be perfectly fine," she repeated under her breath in a futile attempt to calm her nerves. _People can't_ help _but like me,_  she thought, trying to smile wide at herself in the reflection. _I have nothing to worry about..._ right _?_

" _Hey_ , earth to Natasha!"

A voice behind her snapped her out of her daze and she jumped, nearly tripping over her own feet as she whipped around to see who it was. She found her cousin Sonya standing in the doorway with a smug smile on her face and two iced coffees in her hand. Giggling, she asked, "Everything alright?"

Natasha bit her lip and looked down at her shoes, muttering an unconvincing "U-uh, yeah." After a few beats of awkward silence, a cup of coffee entered her field of vision.

"Drink up," said Sonya. Natasha lifted her head to look at her and opened her mouth to speak but Sonya interrupted her. " _Yeah yeah_ , I know you're not allowed to drink coffee, but you're a big girl now!" She laughed from deep within her chest, a laugh infectious enough to make Natasha chuckle as well. "Now there's the smile I know so well!" Sonya leapt forward to pull her into a tight hug, and Natasha allowed the comforting smell of her cousin's perfume on her green army jacket pacify her anxiety for a moment.

As they pulled away from each other, Sonya offered the coffee cup to Natasha again, but the younger girl shook her head no. "I'm already jittery," she told her, "and I don't think that'll help."

Sonya shrugged. "Fine. More for me."

"Sonya! Natasha!" called Natasha's mother from another room, "It's time to go!"

Arm-in-arm, the two girls trekked downstairs, cracking jokes about Natasha's nervousness. Reaching the living room, they both stopped in their tracks as they noticed a familiar face chatting up their parents in front of the door- _the_ Marya Dmitryevna.

Natasha's eyes lit up as the realization set in, and she practically ran at Marya to bring her into a hug, laughing. "Marya! I missed you!" she cried between giggles, only letting go when the redhead began to claw at her arms around her neck. Marya placed a hand on her cheek, smiling warmly. 

"Natasha, how nice it is to see you again."

"Feelin' the love!" Sonya piped up from behind her, and Marya immediately lets go of Natasha to see who the voice was.

"Oh, Sonya!" she exclaimed as she realized who it was and quickly strode over give her a hug as well, her heels clicking on the floor as she did so. "Don't fret, I missed you too."

"I know, it was just a joke," she replied, smiling up at her god-cousin. "How was your, uh... volunteering stint in Africa?"

"It was absolutely lovely!" Marya released the younger girl and turned to Natasha's parents, seated on a leather couch against the wall. "You would not _believe_ the state that those villages were in!"

Natasha's mother, Natalya, frowned slightly and nodded her head. "Gosh, it is just awful, isn't it? God bless your kind soul for helping them, Marya."

Next to her, Natasha's father Ilyich spoke. "But I'm sure you're happy to be a senior now, huh? Only a few more months and you're released out into the world."

"Yes sir, I am thrilled to start my life as an adult." Marya looked over to Natasha and Sonya, who were back standing side by side, and spoke to them. "If you two would go get your bags, I'm driving you to school."

Natasha, with an enthusiastic smile still plastered on her face, immediately dashed to go grab her backpack. When she returned to the living room, she was barraged with kisses and kind words from her parents, who were overcome with fear for their little girl. " _Mom_ , stop embarrassing me in front of Marya!"

"Natasha, I knew you when you were young enough to shit yourself," declared Marya, "I promise your reputation isn't being ruined by any means."

"Marya, language!"

"Um-- sorry, Mrs. Rostova." Sonya giggled softly behind her at the exchange.

Ilyich placed his hands on Natasha's shoulders and looked her in the eyes. "Honey, you're going to have a great time today. I promise."

"High school is the best four years of your life- enjoy it!" said Natalya as she smoothed her hand over her daughter's hair. "I love you."

Natasha sighed. "I love you too, guys. Now can I go? I don't want to be late for my first day."

"Oh, of course!" Ilyich released Natasha's shoulders from his grip. "Like I said you're going to have a great time."

"Yes, dad, I know!" she yelled over her shoulder as she began to leave with her god-sister and cousin. "Bye!"

The three girls piled into Marya's beat up SUV and Sonya and Natasha threw their backpacks into the back seat. The car sputtered to life and Marya pulled out of the driveway, heading towards the school. Her eyes met Natasha's uneasy ones in the rearview mirror and she was quick to strike up a conversation with them. "You two ready?"

"I am, but I'm not too sure about poor Natasha over here," answered Sonya while she typed on her phone and lightly nudged Natasha with her elbow.

"Natasha, there really isn't anything to worry about! I mean, you were popular in middle school, right? So you already have a good reputation, more than enough friends- you're set!"

"Just focus on not going through an emo phase like Marya did," Sonya muttered.

"Okay, _FIRST OF ALL_ -"

"Marya was really into My Chemical Romance for like, a week in her sophomore year-"

" _SOFIA ALEXANDROVNA ROSTOVA, SHUT UP OR I_ WILL _TURN THIS CAR RIGHT AROUND!_ "

"It was bad, though. Like everyone in my class thought it was cringy. And we were _freshmen_. We, the _cringy freshmen_ , thought it was bad-"

" _SONYA, WE BOTH KNOW I WAS THE ONLY REASON YOU GOT ELECTED AS TREASURER AND I WILL GET YOU_ UN-ELECTED _TOO._ "

"Marya, I don't think it's possible to be _un-elected_!" Natasha said, throwing her head back to laugh. At the sound of her laugh, the other two burst into snickers as well, filling the car with the sound of their giggles. After a while, they all managed calmed down and Natasha wiped a tear from her cheek. "That-- That actually really helped, thank you."

"If you ever get nervous, just think of Marya jamming out to Fall Out Boy," Sonya whispered.

The car came to a sudden stop and Marya turned around in her seat to look at them. "Sonya, you are _so damn lucky_ we're already here." She moved, facing the front of the car again, to give Natasha a full view of the large and imposing building she had parked in front of. "Natasha, welcome to Moscow High School."

* * *

"Oh my god!" Marya exclaimed as she looked over Natasha's schedule. The girls now stood in front of Natasha's locker, which was currently being decorated by the owner herself, with stickers and photo strips of her loved ones. Coincidentally, she had managed to get one across the hall from Marya and Sonya's, which somehow managed to make her feel a little bit better about the situation at hand. Brows furrowed, she quirked her head to the side as to inquire what was going on.

"You have health with me!" Marya said, pointing at the slot on her schedule that did, indeed, read _Period 4 - Health - Room 707 - Naryshkin._ Sonya, who looked up from her phone to see what all the commotion was about, caught a glimpse of Natasha's schedule and stepped forward to inspect it.

"Oh, you have it with me too!"

Marya, confused, turned to Sonya. "Why do you have _health_? It's a freshman class and you're a sophomore."

"I failed it," replied Sonya frankly. "Why do _you_ have it?"

"I'm a TA- wait, how did you fail health? It's so _EASY_!" 

Sonya nearly started to defend herself when Natasha decided to speak up. "Can- can you just tell me the general directions to my classes or something?"

Marya sighed and directed her attention back to the piece of paper in her hands. "Well, your first period is in the south wing, um-" she stops for a moment to remember and visualize the corridors in her head, "... towards the football field. And then you have... general science, which is in the north wing-"

"Well _hello there_ , ladies!" calls a male voice, and the three turn their heads in its general direction. There stands a brunette boy with a bit of stubble and a football in his hands, sauntering over to the girls with what could only be described as a try-hard attitude. He slings an arm around Sonya's neck, pulling her close to him, and smirking at the other two. "Lovely morning isn't it?"

All Marya can do is cross her arms and roll her eyes at him. "Leave us alone, Fedya."

His sly smile only manages to grow wider at her rudeness. "I just wanted to see how you _captivating_ young women were doing. Did you have a fun summer with a bunch of starving African children, Marya?" Beside him, Sonya's phone goes off, and she immediately turns off the screen and stuffs it into her jacket pocket. "Ooh, who are _you_ flirting with, _Sofia_?"

"Nicole," she mutters, mirroring Marya's stance with folded arms.

Dolokhov laughs coldly and leans in close to her ear. "You're too pretty to be a lesbian. When are you going to give up on _Nicole_ and just come to the side of dic-"

"Okay, that's _enough_!" Marya shouts, marching over and pulling him off of Sonya. She holds him by the shirt collar and leans in as close as possible to his face. "If I didn't need 'student body president' on my resumé, I'd beat the shit out of you right now." She then pushes him away, but the anger hasn't left her face. "Now go flirt with Hélène or something!" He stands there for a moment, probably in shock, but scurries off when Marya menacingly stomps her foot. As he runs out of the hallway she lets out a huff. "I'm sorry about that, honey. Are you okay?"

Sonya nods and ruffles her bangs for a second with her fingers. "Yeah, I'm fine. He's only been creeping on me since middle school year."

"How is Nicole, by the way?" Natasha asks, placing a comforting hand on Sonya's shoulder.

"She's fine. She's on that same study abroad trip as Andrei is right now."

Marya gasps. "Oh my god, how did I manage to forget about Andrei!" Marya pinches her nose and shakes her head in frustration at herself. "Christ, how did I forget about your dear Andrei? How is he?"

Natasha giggles. "It's fine. I've been trying to not talk about him as much, so it's not your fault." She nods her head over towards Sonya. "Ms. Sofia over there said it was a bit annoying so I've been toning it down. He's doing great and having a wonderful time in Europe. I do miss him dearly, though."

"She emails him like, every day," Sonya adds.

Marya smiles. "That's good! That's great. I'm happy that you two are happy." She pauses for a second. "You should go visit his family."

"Who?"

"Isn't his sister that super religious girl who tries to recruit people for her club?" Sonya inquires.

"Yes, that's Mary."

"Well, I don't know, Marya," responds Natasha. She absentmindedly fiddles with the promise ring on her left ring finger as she speaks. "I mean, he doesn't really talk much about his family so I don't know if he likes or dislikes them or how they act. Or what if they disapprove of us? Like, I know it took you guys a while to accept that he was older than me-"

"Natalie, honey, you'll be fine," Marya coos as she places a hand on Natasha's cheek. "If they like you, they like you. If they don't, they don't. Okay?"

"But I really love him and I want his family to like me-"

"I have Mary's number and I'm telling her you're coming over after school, whether you like it or not," Marya states matter-of-factly and swings her bag over her shoulder. "I'll drive you. You'll be fine." Just as Marya finishes her sentence the bell rings, signaling 5 minutes until the beginning of the school day. 

"Marya, wait, I don't know where all my classes are!" Natasha yells as the senior begins to walk off.

"You know where your first period is, just ask for help later- I've got to go!"

Natasha, distressed, turns to her cousin who is putting on her backpack. "Sorry babe, I've got to go too." She sighs. "Look, I know we have a no phones policy but text me if you need help. Meet me and Marya in front of the library for lunch, ok?" Sonya pulls her close and kisses her forehead. "Buh-bye, love ya." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I KIND OF ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THIS NOTE AND HAVE BARELY ANY RECOLLECTION OF WHAT I HAD BEFORE SO UH. HI.
> 
> my name is lynn. i have written fics both on and off of ao3 before but this is my first theatre fic!! tgc is like, my entire life, so when i saw [this headcanon](https://thegreatheadcanonsof1812.tumblr.com/post/162368422971/modern-high-school-au-natasha-super-hopeful) i immediately knew i had to write it (though it is going to be deviating from it a little bit)
> 
> i'm hoping to update at the least every 2 or 3 days. if the fic isn't finished by the time i start school again in september then i'm shooting for one chapter a week. i have also had a nasty habit of rarely finishing my multi-chapter fics but i am truly dedicated to finishing this one, i promise!!
> 
> things to note:  
> \- yes it's fucking called moscow high i'm SORRY i'm not original enough to think of a better name  
> \- a lot of the first few chapters is going to be mostly dialogue. i'm not only doing this to step out of my comfort zone in writing (i HATE trying to write conversations), but also to help y'all get a feel for the characters' personalities  
> \- to be honest? sonya being a lesbian is me projecting myself onto my fave and i'm not sorry.  
> \- nicole is supposed to be nikolai but like, not incestuous and a girl. in this AU, petya doesn't exist and vera is off in college.  
> \- andrei is spelled with an i because i think it looks prettier.  
> \- i love dolokhov but i had to make him a fuckboy. this i /am/ sorry about. he'll get better. i promise.
> 
> and that's really it! thank you for reading, even if you don't continue following the series! feel free to comment and leave your feedback <33  
> \- lynn
> 
> shameless self-plugs:  
> twitter // [@plasticeyelids](http://www.twitter.com/plasticeyelids)  
> tumblr // [dontbetechnology](http://dontbetechnology.tumblr.com)


	2. ii.

"So, how did the first half of your first day of high school go?" Marya asks as Natasha walks up to the pair who are standing in front of the double doors to the library. Sonya takes her by the arm as the group begins to stroll over to the school cafeteria.

"Well, so far so good?" Natasha replies hesitantly. "I mean, I haven't had any problems, I'm just still a bit nervous."

"Make any friends?" questions Sonya.

"There are lots of people in my classes that I knew in middle school-"

"See?" Marya jokes, "Our little social butterfly had no reason to be scared!"

"I don't think you guys quite grasp that I wasn't popular per sé, it's just that everyone knew Andrei and therefore knew me."

"Natasha, you were crowned the Winter Formal Princess every year for 3 years."

Natasha rolls her eyes. "I know that Sonya, but still!" She sighs. "Yes, I've made plenty of friends already. Julie Karagina was my TA in science and she invited me to sit with her at lunch-"

" _The_ Julie Karagina?" interrupts Sonya, dumbstruck. "She's like, one of the most popular girls in school!"

"Yeah, I know, but it didn't feel right-"

"Natasha-"

"I told her I'd take her up on her offer on Wednesday. I wanted to stay with you guys today. Can't overwhelm myself with all this socializing yet."

Marya nods, grinning at Natasha. "Well, I guess I'm flattered." She takes a second to let her eyes roam over the face of her god-sister, whom she hadn't even been able to see since before she left for her volunteering trip in May. Suddenly overcome with emotion, she pulls Natasha into her arms and rests her chin on the top of her head. "Now, baby, what do you want for lunch?"

Natasha pulls away and glances between her to Sonya. "Well, our parents made us lunch, so-"

"Oh no!" Marya says. "You're not a true high schooler until you've had some of the god awful food that public schools serve."

"I haven't eaten any of Natalya's lunches since like, seventh grade, dude," Sonya chimes in. Chuckling, she grabs her cousin's hand. "I'd say a good start is the nachos with the plastic-y cheese."

~

"Well, there's Julie obviously... I have Mikhail, Dmitry, and-" Natasha, unable to think of someone's name, closes her eyes for a split second, opening them again with a smile as she remembers. "Ester!"

"Um, didn't she bully you in kindergarten?" Sonya asked as she reached across the table to steal a strawberry out of Marya's lunch. then Ester sits next to me in my first period

"Yeah, but she's a real sweetheart! There are no hard feelings between us."

"Well, you seem to be quite famous, huh?" As she spoke, Natasha waved at a classmate passing by her. She shrugged in response, picking at the bowl of nachos in front of her with her fork and hesitantly putting a forkful in her mouth. "Don't be modest!"

Natasha, attempting to change the subject, sticks out her tongue in disgust. "This food is _disgusting_!" She pushes the plastic plate away from her and turns to Sonya. "You really eat this?"

She shrugs. "Sometimes. All the food is kinda low quality so it's really just picking the lesser evil."

Natasha shakes her head, looking off into the distance at the kids seated around them. A specific huddle of peers catches her eye. At a table in the dead center of the cafeteria sits a group of loudly laughing students, one of which being the man that harassed Sonya earlier that morning- Fedya, she believed? Beside him, with a hand on his bicep, is a woman in a bright green dress and curly hair pulled into a bun high on her head and loose strands framing her face. Natasha was struck by her beauty but quickly averted her eyes as the woman turned her head in her direction. Beside her was a stocky man with a beard and glasses who seemed severely out of place in their clique. While everyone around him laughed and yelled, he sat quiet and straight-faced with papers and a book strewn out on the table in front of him. He jumped at a sudden uproar of laughter and, at that moment, managed to meet Natasha's eye. Slowly, he lifted his hand to wave at her.

Natasha gasped. "Oh, it's Pierre!"

"Who?" Sonya questioned. Marya looked up from her salad to turned around to see what she was talking about.  


She raised her hand to wave back at him. "You must remember Pierre! He would come to every party when we were little. I think he babysat once or twice." She beamed at him and faced Marya. "He's your age, isn't he? I haven't seen him in years!"

Marya sighed. "Yes, he is. He was sent to boarding school when you were around 6. And he stayed there for a few years until he..."

"He... what?"

"He got kicked out right before his freshman year for tying a bear to a cop. As a dare."

Natasha was unable to hold in her laughter and doubled over the table. "He... he... how?!"

Marya, despite trying her hardest to keep it together, allowed herself to grin and laugh a bit as well. "I, um... I don't know."

"But um," Marya continued, "when he came back he got involved with the Kuragin family. So, he started dating Hélène; that's the girl in the green dress."

"Head cheerleader," added in Sonya, "and total bitch."

"She and Pierre have been dating for three years now, but it's obviously because A- he's one of the top students in our class so he does all of her homework; and B- if there's anything the Kuragins are known for, it's drugs, alcoholism, and parties, and Pierre is rich with a big house."

"She's probably been cheating on him with Dolokhov their whole relationship. And then cheating on _him_ with every guy in school."

"I don't appreciate the slut-shaming but either way, she's generally a woman one should stay _far_ away from," Marya finishes.

Hearing this, Sonya puts down her phone and looks Marya in the eyes. "Weren't you found making out with her in the bathroom at homecoming last year?" Suddenly, she yelps in pain, clearly having been kicked under the table by Marya. "Okay, okay! Nevermind!"

"Dolokhov, the asshat that tried to hit on Sonya today, is one of the top football players in the school. We only won last year's season because of him- he _killed_ Hamilton High. Now all the girls are _mad_ about him."

"He's the smartest guy on the football team," Sonya said, "which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf." She laughed at a reference the other two didn't quite grasp.

"He's almost head-to-head in terms of playboy-ness with Anatole, Hélène's brother," Marya muttered, Speaking of Anatole, where is he? He's usually got a gaggle of girls falling for him too." She began to look around the cafeteria but, when she saw no trace of the man she was looking for, shrugged. "It's probably better you don't meet him."

At that moment the bell rang, and the girls got up to throw away their trash. "What class do you guys have next?" Marya asked.

"Theatre 3," Sonya said.

"Oh, good, because I have Choir!" Natasha answered. "Can you walk me there?"

After saying bye to Marya, the two began to trek towards the east wing. As she entered the area of what would be the official boundaries of the "art wing", Natasha observed the paint on the walls transforming from a muddy red-brown to a beautiful mosaic of all the shades in the rainbow and fantastic pieces of art adorning the walls. They ultimately reached the small theater room and Sonya gave her another kiss on her forehead, pointing to where Natasha's choir class would be. When she reached the door marked A24, the same room number on her schedule, she poked her head in and saw a few students already sitting at the gray risers set up in the classroom before striding in. However, she hadn't noticed the boy with strikingly blonde hair who was approaching the door- though, with him walking backward, he hadn't seen her either. The two crashed into each other, causing Natasha to drop all of her notebooks and folders that she had been holding in her arms. 

"Oh, oh dear!" she yelped, immediately crouching down to begin picking up her papers. "I'm so sorry," she sighed, only looking up at him for a brief second as she apologized. "I wasn't looking."

"Oh no, it's quite alright my darling." He crouched down as well, seemingly to help her, but instead did nothing with his hands perched on his knees. He stood up as Natasha did as well and opened his mouth to speak but she walked away, not having been looking at his face. Flustered, she scurried off towards a corner to sit down. Anatole stayed in his place for more than a few beats, a strange expression painted on his face as he watched her walk away, before shaking himself out of his daze and leaving.

"Was that Anatole Kuragin?" a girl behind her whispered, tapping on Natasha's shoulder.

"Um, excuse me?"

"That boy, that was Anatole Kuragin! Do you know how blessed you have been to be able to touch him!" The girl burst into squeals and giggles, turning back to her friends next to her to gush about how she's always had a crush on him. Natasha nervously began to pick at a loose thread on the hem of her white dress when she felt the presence of someone next to her. She tilted her head up to see who it was.

"Liza, the Little Princess!"

Natasha stood up to pull her longtime friend into an embrace. She and Liza had been friends throughout all of elementary and middle school but managed to talk very little in the summer between eighth grade and their freshman year. While Sonya was, admittedly, her best friend, Liza and Natasha still had a close bond. When they both pulled away from the hug, Natasha noted her classic smile; though her top lip was a bit short and thin in a resting facial expression, when it joined her bottom lip in a smile it was nothing short of beautiful. To Natasha, it seemed that defects in otherwise beautiful women actually become redeeming qualities.

"Natasha, you look wonderful!" Liza ran her hands down Natasha's arms, sighing happily. "It's good to see you."

"Alright, ladies and gentleman settle down!" In her musings, Natalie had blocked out the sound of the bell ringing. The girls sat down in the risers, Natasha with her arms wrapped around her knees. "Welcome to your third period! I am Mrs. Bogdanovna, and I will be your choir instructor this year..."

* * *

Natasha plopped down in the seat next to Sonya with a huff, looking about at the aged room that their health class was being held in. 

"Hey," Sonya murmured, "how'd third period go?"

"Really well, I ran into Liza and we kinda just chatted the whole time."

"That's good. I'm glad to hear you've got plenty of friends already," she said, gazing warmly at her cousin. "Theatre went absolutely splendidly. In fact, I'm thinking of auditioning for the musical."

"I think that's a wonderful idea!" Marya pulled up a chair between their two desks with a clipboard in hand, smiling at Sonya. "We're doing Shrek, right? I think you'd make a perfect Fiona."

Sonya shrugs her shoulders, pursing her lips. "I would love to, but we both know I have a pretty unconventional voice-"

"C'mon, take a chance!" Natasha exclaimed, lightly punching her in the arm. Sonya rolled her eyes and looked towards the front of the classroom as she noticed the instructor attempting to quell any conversations. Just as she opened her mouth, however, the wooden door behind her suddenly and forcefully swung open, nearly hard enough to leave a hole in the wall from the door handle. Several upperclassmen started to run into the classroom, adorned with glow sticks around their necks and wrists and one holding a Bluetooth speaker blasting music. The teacher, dumbfounded, attempted to ask what's going on but was drowned out by the yelling.

"Hello everybody!" one woman exclaimed, and Natasha realized it was Hélène. She stood in front of the whiteboard with green glowsticks all up and down her arms, smiling wide. She had also changed from her green dress from earlier into a cheerleading uniform; it was red with "MOSCOW HIGH" across the chest in white and golden accents. In her hands, she also held a pair of pom-poms. "Hi there, little freshmen! My name is Hélène Kuragina, and I am the head of the Moscow cheerleading squad!" The group of people behind her briefly shout and whoop at this. "Along with that, I am also... the head of our Link Crew!"

"Oh my god, I forgot about this," Sonya and Marya manage to say in unison.

"So the job of the Link Crew is to help you poor li-- uh, wonderful little freshies-" Natasha cringed at the use of the word freshie, having heard it all towards the end of eighth grade, "transition between middle school and high school!" Natasha noticed Dolokhov in the overly enthusiastic crowd behind her. "So, we're going to be working on some community building exercises!"

"Marya," Sonya whispered, "can you use your, like, president powers to get this to stop being a thing? This'll make the second time I've had to go through this, and that is two times too many."

"Okay everyone, circle up!"

With a reluctant groan, the class stood up, spreading out to the perimeter of the classroom as to be able to include everyone in a badly shaped circle. Héléne had been smiling for so long and so widely it appeared at this point that she was just showing teeth; while unwillingly trudging to one side of the classroom, Natasha heard Marya whisper something about how Hélène is only on the Link Crew for Dolokhov.

"Alright, so here's what we're going to do: we're going to go around in a circle and everyone will say their name and describe themselves with one word! For example, I would say... Hélène is g-"

"A SLUT!" someone blurted out, bursting into a laugh as they finished. However, Hélène's smile did not falter- in fact, she giggled with them. prompted the first person in line.

"Yes, that would work." She tucked a strand of her that was in her eyes behind her ear. "But here are some more examples!"

"Dolokhov is fierce!" he shouted behind her, stepping up and putting an arm around her shoulder.

Another voice behind them spoke up. "And Anatole is hot." The man in question appeared behind the couple, leaning against Hélène. A girl across the room from Natasha clasped her hand over her mouth in excitement, and with a giddy smile began to whisper to her friend while looking between her and the boy, who Natasha now knew as Anatole. At that moment, she also realized that he was the boy she ran into last period. He looked around the room and his eyes landed on Natasha, who was trying her best to avoid just that. But now, with their eyes locked, she took a moment to look over his features. He had platinum blonde- nearly white- hair slicked back that stood in remarkable contrast to that of Hélène (who she also now knew as his sister, remembering the conversation she and her friends had during lunch). He dressed quite formally for the setting, with black slacks and a black-and-white button on top and a black vest over it. Natasha suddenly felt very exposed with her low-cut and short white dress but realized that his gaze never seemed to falter on her face. _How handsome he is_ , she thought, _how... exhilarating_.

"Anastasia is... fun."

"Viktor is brave!"

"Artur is funny." 

Natasha snapped out of her gaze as she realized the line was about to reach her, shifting her eyes to the floor. Her right hand instinctively began to twiddle with the ring on her left hand, a gift from Andrei before he left for his trip. It was made out of white celestite, one of Natasha's favorite stones- not only for the color but for the meaning behind it as well. Natasha remembered beeing told when she was little that a normal, loveless life is like being asleep. But, when one falls in love, they awake from their slumber, becoming Gods, celestial beings. Being in love with Andrei was exactly like that: he was the king and she was the queen of their own heaven. She was always a spiritual girl, having been interested in the idea of both a past and after life since she was young enough to grasp such concepts. _"And, 'celestite' comes from the Latin word for 'heaven',"_ he told her as he slipped it onto her left ring finger and kissed her on the forehead all those months ago.

"Marya is- uh... old school?" 

Hélène sighed. "I'll count it."

"Sonya is good!"

Sonya turned to Natasha, who was still fidgeting with the ring but had her brows furrowed in thought.

"Natasha is...young."

* * *

 

After a while, the terribly forced team building exercises had come to a close, as well as the school day. Natasha had felt Anatole's eyes on her the whole time but ignored it in favor of wallowing in fond memories of Andrei.

"Hey, I texted Mary and told her you were coming over after school," Marya said. "I have to stay after for some presidential duties but I can pick you up at your house around 5, alright?" Natasha shook her head yes and Marya patted her on the back. "You made it through your first day! I'm proud of you."

Sonya and Natasha waved Marya goodbye and departed for their house, chatting along the way about the happenings of that day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i couldn't think of a good way to end this chapter i am sORRY
> 
> things to note:  
> \- yes, sonya is a theatre kid. like i said, i'm projecting myself onto her!  
> \- marya is super bi and super in the closet  
> \- ha ha get it, anatole meets natasha in naryshkin's class because HE HAD LONG WISHED TO HAVE THAT HAPPINESS EVERY SINCE THE NARYSHKINS' BALL HA HA I'M FUNNY  
> \- yes i know liza is andrei's dead ex-wife in the book but i needed more characters let me live. and yes, i kinda just rewrote the description of liza's smile for this.  
> \- a lot of what i'm writing about the school, in particular, is based off of my own high school. like, we're actually doing shrek for our fall 2017 musical. we have a really cringy link crew who really does "team building exercises" like that.  
> \- i've been going back and changing small details in the first chapter so don't be alarmed if i continue doing that in the new chapters as i go along  
> \- i go to such a big school that there's really no such thing as "popular" kids so i don't know how people really act when exposed to the "popular crowd" like anatole so i'm kind of just taking cheesy elements from high school movies and throwing them together tbqh  
> the next chapter is literally going to be so fun to write bc it's gonna be the PRINCESS MARY SHOW and i love mary with every fiber of my being.
> 
> thank you for reading, and i encourage you guys to comment and/or leave feedback!! <333
> 
> -lynn
> 
> shameless self-plugs:  
> twitter // [@plasticeyelids](http://www.twitter.com/plasticeyelids)  
> tumblr // [dontbetechnology](http://dontbetechnology.tumblr.com)


	3. iii.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning for verbal and [nearly] physical abuse and victim blaming

Mary slowly and softly closed the door behind her in an attempt to create as little noise as possible. Through the years of living in this house, she knew which floorboards creaked and moaned from age and cautiously stepped around them. Clutching the straps of her backpack tight, stuck to the side of the staircase and tread lightly as she went up to her room. She had made it halfway up the stairs when she heard the rough voice she had been trying so hard to avoid, calling her name from the bedroom on the first floor.

"Marya! Marya, come here right this instant!"

Sighing heavily, she dropped her backpack onto the top step and held her ankle-length dress up as she scurried down the stairs. The voice grumbled and groaned as she made her way to the bedroom, murmuring unintelligible words. She hesitantly opened the door and her eyes landed on her aging father, sitting upright in his bed surrounded by pillows, hacking into a handkerchief gripped tight in his hands. He sniffed as he took notice of her presence and pushed his glasses up onto the top of his head.

"And where have _you_ been?" he snarled, clearly displeased with her. He glanced over at a large analog clock perched on the wall, reading 3:50. "You're home late."

She chuckled- a smile on her face despite his attitude- and moved a tuft of hair out of her eyes. "Yes, I apologize for that, father; I stayed after school for a bit to make posters for my club--"

"Oh, _that_ ," he interrupts and drops his head onto the pillow behind him with a grunt. "I had forgotten about that God damned club." Whether or not his offensive joke was intentional, he laughs under his breath at it. Mary's hand immediately goes towards the rosary around her neck, running her thumb over the ivory beads. He pushes himself away from the fortress of pillows and swings his fragile legs over the side of the bed and Mary immediately rushes over to his bedside and puts her arm around his back. "When will you stop fiddling with your ridiculous little icons?"

She let out a small sigh as she helped him up and out of bed, and avoided looking at him as he spoke; instead, she focused on the various medals on the wall that he had collected over his life, many weathered and tarnished but still proudly displayed. "Father," she started, already fully aware of where this conversation was about to be heading, "I have nothing but the deepest respect for you, and you know this. I simply believe in... a higher being." She sat him down at the kitchen table, fully dressed and large for the amount of occupants usually inhabit the house and how often they sit down as a family. Without Andrey, it was simply Mary, Nikolai, and Bourienne- however, Mary is always either stowed away in her room or looking after her father; Bourienne is out spending massive amounts of Nikolai's money; and the man himself is either sleeping or yelling. Upon this thought crossing her mind, Mary snickered but immediately returned to a straight face when her father glanced at her disdainfully out of the corner of his eye.

"What are you laughing about?"

"O-oh, um, nothing, sir. Just... remembered something that happened at school today!" She nervously chuckled then turned her back to him to grab food out of the fridge.

"Ah, yes, your schooling... What are you now, a sophomore?"

She paused what she was doing for a moment to think about what he said. " _No_ , I am a senior. I'm graduating this year, remember?"

He vaguely murmured a "yes".

Marya placed a bowl of oatmeal and a spoon on the table in front of him and he sluggishly extended a trembling hand towards it. The house sat in an unusual and alarming silence as he did so, to the point where Mary could've sworn she heard his bones creak. 

"Uh, father... Natalya will be coming for tea later."

"Who is that again?" He took in a spoonful of oatmeal. 

Mary cleared her throat. "Andrey's girlfriend."

He guffawed. "Oh, _her_." He wiped his mouth but all it accomplished was smearing the food in his graying beard. Mary grabs a napkin from the kitchen counter and begins wiping at his mouth. "She's a worthless little girl," he continues, "Frankly, I'm surprised Andrey has been with her this long."

"Father, you've never _met_ her," she says, pulling back to check if she got all of it.

"I've seen the photos and heard the talk of the town. She's poor and dumb. That's _all_ I need to know."

"What ' _talk_ ' would you be talking about?" 

"Why, the talk that Miss Bourienne brings home!"

Up until that point, Mary had been carefully choosing her words, her inflections, everything about presence as to not offend her father. But hearing the words _"Bourienne"_ and _"home"_ in the same sentence managed to awake Mary's deep-seated aggression and she was unable to stay reserved.

"What is the difference between Natalya and Miss Bourienne?" she blurted out.

He snapped his head toward her, dropping his spoon into the bowl. "Excuse me?"

"What is the difference between Natalya and Miss Bourienne, father?"

His brows furrowed together in both confusion and anger. "Whatever do you mean, Marya?"

"You've said that Natalya is worthless, poor, and dumb. What is the difference between her and Bourienne!" When he still simply stared at her, confused, she continued. "Gosh, father, how can you not see that Miss Bourienne is simply using you! She comes home every night having spent hundreds upon hundreds of your dollars and you don't bat an eye!" As she spoke, strands of her immaculately braided hair, which coincidentally sat on her head like the halo of an angel, began to fall out of place. "She takes advantage of your weakness and it's _disgusting_!" Mary's voice had always been soft and gentle, and even when upset that managed to not change, save for a voice crack as she uttered the word "disgusting".

Nikolai shot up from his seat, an action that shocked and alarmed Mary, who was only beginning to realize what she said. "What exactly are you insinuating, Marya?" Frightened, Mary was unable to answer, her big round eyes simply staring up at him. He laughs- though it comes out more of an intimidating growl- at her lack of response. "Oh, so now you won't say anything, hm?" He begins walking towards her, her mirroring his action as she begins taking steps back towards the wall. "It's my money, Marya, mine! Not yours, you ungrateful little girl!"

Marya felt the wall press against her back and her heart began to race.

"I take in a woman out of the kindness of my heart and provide for you both with my money, and this is how you repay me? You wouldn't have anything you have now if it wasn't for me! Not a _thing_!" Mary instinctively shielded her face as he raised his hand. "You insolent girl," he yelled, " _insolent girl_!"

He was about to strike her when he suddenly stepped back, dazed and confused. "Where are my glasses?" he asked, quiet at first, as he continued on he grew louder. "Where are my glasses? My glasses- where are they! My glasses!" He began to pat himself down, feeling for his glasses and stumbling around the room. Mary slowly raised her arms, her face painted with concern and fear. Once she processed what he was saying, her eyes began to dart around the room in the search for his spectacles.

"Oh, I've aged, I've aged so very much-- M-Marya, my glasses, my glasses, my glasses, my glasses..."

That's when she saw them sitting upon his head. Noticing his shaking legs, she tried to walk towards him and speak but was met with more yelling.

"Where are my glasses, where are they?"

"F-father-"

" _Where are my glasses?!_ " he screamed one final time, nearly collapsing if it wasn't for Mary being by his side. She held him with one hand on his upper arm and another on the small of his back. She softly cooed reassurances in his ear while she escorted him back to his room and into his bed. He fell asleep nearly immediately upon getting into bed, and once Mary was sure he was comfortable, tip-toed out of the room.

It wasn't until she closed his door that she became aware of the warm tears running down her face and while she attempted to wipe them away, they simply kept coming, wracking her whole body with sobs. Her feet gave out from under her and she slid against the door until she was sitting on the floor with her knees pulled against her heaving chest.

 _Gosh, I am so horribly stupid_ , she thought to herself. _He must be right. I'm so incredibly ungrateful. He is my father and he demands_ _respect, and so does Bourienne. He's old and feeble and I dare to judge him?_ In one hand she grips the cross of her rosary tight enough for the edges to dig into her palm. _I'm disgusting. And dumb. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb..._

She's not sure how long she's been sitting on the floor by the time she calms down and slowly pulls herself back up. Remembering that Natasha will be arriving soon, she decides to tidy up a bit. 

On the way to the kitchen to clean up her father's food she catches a glance of herself in the mirror, but immediately looks away.

She has never seen herself as anything above plain, average, so-so; growing up to see many of her peers blossom into beautiful women has only elevated this feeling of inadequacy. This is part of the reason she's resigned to only become her father's caretaker, a passing object in people's lives: for who could love such a homely girl?

If only Mary could see the radiance that her face takes she speaks of something she loves. The warmth found within the crinkle of her eyes and smile lines. The grace her wide, compassionate eyes add to her features when she's not looking in the mirror.

If only Mary knew how beautiful she truly was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can you tell i really love mary. i was also really in love with the way in the book that mary was described as plain but having these beautiful, expressive eyes that light up her face, which she is completely unaware of, and i wanted to keep that. for being a victim of abuse myself it was strangely hard to properly express abuse? like, to write dialogue that sounded realistic and not like he was ~just being mean~. but i hope i did my girl justice. i am actually really proud of this chapter too, writing-wise.  
> sorry for the shorter chapter but i really wanted to focus on the happenings of the bolkonsky house (bc i do have a lot of opinions on the fact no one talks about mary's situation). next chapter will be the equivalent of natasha & bolkonskys + no one else
> 
> thank you for reading! <3  
> \- lynn
> 
> shameless self-plugs:  
> twitter // [@plasticeyelids](http://www.twitter.com/plasticeyelids)  
> tumblr // [dontbetechnology](http://dontbetechnology.tumblr.com)


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